Don't be afraid to empty your cup ☕
Issue #67
Whenever I open a new window on my computer, it greets me with a brief message. Sometimes it says, “Good morning, Chrissy.” Other times it offers a mantra - just now, it said “Where your focus goes, your energy flows.” I don’t pay much attention to these little sayings, though I like to think they have some positive effect on me. At the very least they make work, nearly all of which happens on my laptop these days, a friendlier place.
Earlier this week, the words that popped up read “Empty your cup,” which seemed oddly aggressive. Aren’t glasses supposed to be half full? Shouldn’t my cup runneth over? I Slacked my friend Mary about it, and we decided that it meant one should not fill their days with a hundred distractions and challenges. For example, if I'm already trying to establish a daily meditation practice AND write 1,000 words a day for two weeks, there is no need to also join my friends for a 40 day running streak. A cup can be too full. A little emptiness never hurt anyone.
Eventually I Googled the phrase and learned it’s actually a Zen proverb about the dangers of the ego. Someone who thinks they know everything can’t learn anything; to add something new, they must make room. They have to empty their cup.
☕️
This week has been a hard one. Between a white woman threatening a black birder in Central Park, to the horrific murder of George Floyd, to the rebellion unfolding in Minneapolis, to the ongoing pandemic, to the shameful response from the American president on all fronts, I’ve felt so much sadness and anger. A few times, I thought it might be better to stay at home forever and permanently keep my distance. Why would I want to be out in that world, with all its horror and hurt?
The temptation to opt out didn't last long. Isolating myself and ignoring the systemic problems plaguing my country would be a privilege, one I haven't earned and don't deserve. America is my home, and it will never truly be safe for me until it's safe for everyone.
By the end of the week, I was still thinking about the advice to “empty your cup”, the way such a simple phrase - three words, four syllables - can change and evolve. First, it was personal - don’t attempt a running streak on top of everything else. Then, it was universal - someone who thinks they know everything can’t learn anything. Today, thinking about the world, my place in it, and where we go from here, it feels transformational.
The cup is full of poison. Help empty it, and start over. 💛
Plant of the Week
I walk my dog three miles a day, once in the morning, and then again after work. We always follow the same loop, which is not as boring as it sounds. Our route may be the same, but that's the only constant. Different flowers are always blooming - currently, it's the daylilies' turn - yesterday's barren tree is suddenly covered in buds, mushrooms explode from the soil, gardens are planted and pruned. Everything is interesting if you pay enough attention.
Relatable Reads
75 Things White People Can Do for Racial Justice, Equality Includes You. A lot of the advice I read for white people who want to fight for racial justice focuses on internal work - not centering yourself, amplifying black and brown voices, diversifying your bookshelf, etc. Which is fine, but at some point you need to do some external work, too. This list is full of important actions - some easy, some more difficult - that we all can and should take. ✊🏻✊🏼✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿
Thanks to Bookshop, There Is No Reason to Buy Books on Amazon Anymore, Inside Hook. "In simple terms, it’s a super clean, user-friendly online bookstore whose raison d’être is supporting independent bookstores — not simply with exposure or resources (though that’s certainly a factor), but with cold hard cash." 📚
From Fruit-at-the-Bottom to Keto: How Yogurt in America Reflects its Food Trends, Vox. Nearly every morning, I eat a bowl of plain, non-fat Greek yogurt with fruit and granola for breakfast, and apparently that means I'm stuck in the 2000s. What can I say? It's delicious here. 🍓
A Tiny Challenge
If you're white, pick one of those 75 things from the list I shared above and get it done. (I started by setting up a recurring monthly donation to the Southern Poverty Law Center.) If you're black or brown, living through this past week in America was enough of a challenge. I see you, I'm sorry, and I stand with you.
Until next Sunday. 💌
Thank you to Carol D. and Miranda W. for their generous donations last week!
You helped make my donation to the SPLC possible. 💛
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