An open door policy
Come on in, it's newsletter time!
Welcome to So Relatable, a monthly newsletter for creative folks who want to make things that matter. To support my creative work, buy my zines! ✨
We have a large garden in our front yard. An unorthodox choice, but the best one for our situation—big space, lots of sun, grass is dumb. Over the course of two years we tore up the lawn, built raised beds, mulched in between, and planted fruit trees in the empty spaces, including figs, loquats, lemons, and satsumas. The garden requires a lot of weeding and tending and we’re always behind schedule, but after five years we’re starting to get the hang of it. Vegetables grow. Fruits ripen. Herbs flower. And still, there are surprises.
A few weeks ago we noticed a little bit of green poking up through the mulch, right where it borders the driveway. A weed, probably. We ignored it, as there were other, more pressing tasks to tend to. The weed continued to grow. Leaves unfurled. Flowers blossomed. Apparently the bees paid it a visit because one day, as we were walking by, we paused and took a closer look. The weed was not a weed. It was a very small tomato plant, and it was bearing fruit.
This tomato plant is what we call a “volunteer”—the result of an intrepid seed that found its way into the dirt and took hold. Volunteers don’t care if that spot is a sliver of dirt next to the driveway. They don’t mind if it’s definitely not tomato season. They know that when a door cracks open, you waltz in, no questions asked.
In the spirit of this little tomato, here’s a list of doors I’m currently opening, closing, and leaving ajar:
Schedules! In case you missed it, this newsletter is now on a monthly schedule—maybe for now, maybe forever. I still like writing to you, but I don’t have as much to say, or maybe it just takes me longer to say it. Thanks for sticking around, and for opening these newsletters whenever they arrive. I see you and I appreciate you!
Routines! I’ve been thinking a lot about routines, and how they shift and change with the seasons. (Hence the move to a monthly newsletter!) As I write this the sun is rising at 6:20am, but it’s really 7:20, because we turned back the clocks and also because time, like money, is an imaginary force that nevertheless controls our lives. Now that it’ll be dark in the evenings, I’m thinking about how I can shift my routine and claw back some control. More evenings at the YMCA and the yoga studio. Craft nights with friends. Puzzles at the kitchen table. Anything to prop open the door so life doesn’t feel like it ends when the sun goes down.
Mornings! I started seeing a nutritionist last month, which has been fascinating. My insurance covers it (for now, lol) and I figured I’m in my mid-40s, my body is probably going to start ~changing~ soon, and I want to get ahead of things so I can continue gardening and practicing yoga until I’m 103. So far, the biggest revelation is that I should NOT be waking up at 5am, immediately drinking two cups of coffee on an empty stomach, and then going directly to a 6am workout. Something about cortisol levels, adrenaline, etc. So now I wake up at 5am, drink a cup of peppermint tea, eat a piece of toast with peanut butter, and THEN workout. This change was not as difficult as I feared, and I actually do feel calmer and steadier throughout the day. Wild!
Clutter! For November, I’m doing a 30-day decluttering challenge with my friend April (HI, APRIL!). My house doesn’t look too cluttered or messy, until you open a drawer or closet—then all hell breaks loose. It feels like a good time to do this, because I’m going to be spending more time indoors due to the aforementioned darkness. Plus texting updates to April is super motivating! Highly recommend finding a friend as neurotic as you.
Books! I read The Dream Hotel last month and can’t stop thinking about it. In it, a woman is accused of planning to commit a violent crime based on data collected from her dreams, and is taken to a retention center where she must prove she’s no longer a risk before she can rejoin society. It’s about surveillance culture, corporate bureaucracy, and how easily we trade freedom for the false promise of less friction. In other words: EXTREMELY MY JAM. I’m not kidding when I say the first thing I did upon finishing the book was to delete a bunch of apps and turn off my location data. That’s one door I do NOT need open.
Hugo! Finally, I leave you with this—Hugo’s entry into his daycare’s Halloween costume contest. The name tag was designed by April (HI AGAIN, APRIL) and the shirt is mine. I’ve never dressed up a dog for Halloween, but this year it felt vital and necessary, a bit of silly fun to combat the darker days. Leave the door ajar for joy. You never know where it’ll come from, or when it will arrive.
Thanks for reading! I’ll see you again in December. Until then, stay cozy and leave the lights on. 💛
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👋 About Me: I’m Chrissy Hennessey, an enthusiastic snacker and native New Yorker living in coastal North Carolina, where I stayed after earning my MFA. My writing has appeared in a decent number of journals, I’ve received fellowships to some fancy residencies, and I’ve written three unpublished novels. This newsletter is a passion project I started in 2019 as a way to connect with artists and writers, share my creative journey, and build a community. Thank you for being here!
Hugo's costume is PERFECTION!
I saw this little tomato plant when I came to visit Hugo and was so pleased by its little triumph! So glad to see it featured here.